mardi 20 juillet 2010

the world is sinking

i hate that i cant listen to certain songs without tearing up about you. i hate that im the kind of girl i never thought i would be, worn out over a boy. i hate that i became this open sort of girl because of you, for you; and i especially hate that now i am her, you are someplace else laughing at how stupid i am. laughing at how your life is so much better now that you are free of me.

and then I remind myself that you’re becoming a completely different person. and maybe, once you fully develop into him, I won’t like you anymore, because he’s not the real you. But then there’s the ache of thinking that i’ll lose you, as a friend. So what am I to do? All I can come to right now is to sit and watch this play out, and hope to God that you don’t disappear into someone else. Please dont disappear.

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